Zimbabwe

For the past fifteen months I've had a strange fascination with Zimbabwe. While in India last year I talked with an American kid named Matt who had just spent a few weeks in the country. Matt introduced Zimbabwe to our conversation by saying, “There is no man in the world who I want to kick in the teeth more than Robert Mugabe.” He went on to tell me about Zimbabwe's tragic downfall from one of the most promising countries in Africa to one of the most corrupt, AIDS ridden, poverty stricken nations on the planet.

Zimbabwe's problems began about ten years ago when President Robert Mugabe drove the white landowners off of thousands of commercial farms, which were the backbone of Zimbabwe's economy, then replaced the farmers with his crooked cronies who couldn't tell a tractor from a toothbrush. The situation wasn't helped by the fact that Mugabe simultaneously decided to fund his backwards government, not to mention his lavish yet tasteless personal lifestyle, by printing as much paper currency as he felt was necessary. The resulting hyper-inflation has effectively robbed the citizens of Zimbabwe of the value of their money and has placed that value in Mugabe's filthy pockets. It's anyone's guess as to what, exactly, will happen with Zimbabwe, but every time it appears as if life can't get any worse for it's citizens, somehow it does... usually because of Mugabe.

When I first planned the epic trip I had no intention of visiting Zimbabwe, and when intimidation, violence, and murder was carried out by Mugabe's thugs during the recent “elections” last June I was determined to stay as far away from the country as possible. Visiting a place in real life can change things. I met several people during the past couple of days who visited the falls on the Zimbabwe side and told me it was safe, so suddenly there was no reason not to take a look for myself.This morning I rolled out of bed at 5:30 and arrived at the border at 6:00; just in time to be the first to cross today from Zambia to Zimbabwe.

The falls are incredible when viewed from Zimbabwe. With that said, they're incredible from Zambia. I've heard from a lot of people that the views are much better from Zimbabwe, but I happen to be the first I know of to disagree. The great thing about the Zimbabwean side is that three quarters of the falls sit within the country's borders, so visitors can walk nearly the whole width of them with incredible views from the other side of the gorge. I liked the views from Zambia better because the angles of the viewpoints are such that visitors can see straight down the middle of the gorge until the view fades into the watery mist rising from the bottom of the falls in Zimbabwe.I was very surprised at how well maintained the National Park facilities were in Zimbabwe. Back home all that anyone ever hears about Zimbabwe is how corrupt and backwards and deteriorating it is. I've thought to myself before that if the country were once one of the most promising in Africa then it must at least have part of the infrastructure that was built during brighter times. That theory has turned out to be pretty valid based on what I saw today. As the sky turned from dark blue to light blue and then to pink, I walked to the edge of the falls in the National Park site. A red hot sliver of sun rose above the horizon and I knew it was time to hustle along the gorge if I wanted views of the falls in the early morning light. I walked from viewpoint to viewpoint along the immaculately maintained pathways, stopping for a look around at every one, until I finally came to the last viewpoint where cliffs dropped away on two sides and the Zambezi rushed by hundreds of feet below. On the Zambian side wooden rails protect the edge of the gorge so it's not possible to fall in with out trying. In Zimbabwe the final viewpoint is appropriately named “Danger Point” and guard rails are conspicuously missing. A small hand-painted sign on the ground at the view point read, “Do not cross this point. Ground is slippery.” I hope nobody learned that the hard way.I knew that my flight to Johanessburg was scheduled to leave at 12:15 this afternoon, but I still had two items of business to take care of after I left the falls. First, I needed to get some of the currency printed by Mugabe's corrupt government to take home as a souvenier, but I also wanted to take a look at the inside of one of Zimbabwe's notoriously empty grocery stores. I asked directions to a grocery store and headed on my way through the town of Victoria Falls, but a local man about my age quickly latched on to me, obviously because he wanted to sell me something. My new cohort introduced himself as Craig and rattled off a list of tourist kitch and services that he could provide for me. I wasn't interested in anything he had to offer, but I did want something else from him.

“Where can I get some Zimbabwe dollars?” I knew that dealing currency on the street is illegal in Zimbabwe, but I also knew that, as was the case when I was in Myanmar, it is very commonplace and there really is no other way of getting Zim dollars.

“I can get you dollars!!!”, Craig answered. “How much do you want?”

“What can you give me for five US?” This was where the effects of hyper-inflation would really show. Fifteen months ago Matt, the kid I met in India, got sixty thousand Zim dollars per US dollar. The exchange rate would be high, but I still was a little shocked when Craig answered...

“For five US I will give you four hundred billion Zimbabwe dollars.”

As Craig and I walked to his friend's office, where the exchange would take place, I chatted with him about life in Zimbabwe. The supermarket we passed was closed, but Craig said that there is very little food inside and that it is only for “people who have money”. Craig told me about the recent elections. Many of his friends were threatened or beaten by Mugabe's military. One of his friends had his hand broken, and another's house was burned to the ground. “Mugabe rigged us!!!”, Craig told me.

Being a billionaire in Zimbabwe is great, but I had to price a few things out to put it all into perspective. At the local “Wimpy's” fast food restaurant a cheeseburger costs two-hundred thirty billion Zimbabwe dollars, and if I wanted to catch a train, a second class ticket from Victoria Falls to Buluwayo would cost one-hundred trillion one-hundred seventy billion dollars. Craig and I talked about the hyper-inflation. Today five US dollars bought me four hundred billion Zim dollars. Last week five US was worth two hundred fifty billion. Who knows what it will be next week... maybe close to one trillion. I told Craig that in the US, a nice house could be bought for about five hundred thousand US dollars.

“Like one with an upstairs!?” Craig asked.

“Like one in the movies”, I said.

I asked Craig how much a house in Zimbabwe would cost in the local currency. He answered. “...We be talking about something like a zillion.”

I sat down with Craig's freind, gave him five US one dollar bills, then watched him lay out eight fifty billion dollar Zimbabwe notes in front of me. Later I traded a few of the notes with other Zimbabweans for two twenty-five billion dollar notes and one one-hundred billion dollar note.

For my last hour in Zimbabwe I followed Craig along a narrow dirt trail through the bush to the edge of the Zambezi about one hundred meters from where it falls over the end of the gorge. A few adult baboons wandered nearby and two small babies tumbled over each other and tugged at their parents.After crossing back into Zambia I took a minibus to Livingstone and talked with a Zimbabwean man named Phil on the way. It's amazing to me that despite all the corruption and devestation that has occured in Zimbabwe during the past ten years, both of the Zimbabwean men I talked to today are very optimistic that things will change. In the Western media all anyone ever hears is how bleak the situation is, but here on the other side of the world the people who are acutally living through the madness manage to see a glimmer of hope. Phil told me that nearly all the farms and factories in Zimbabwe have shut down, but that the equipment is still sitting intact, waiting to be fired up again the second that the political situation is right. I mentioned that once Zimbabwe has the confidence of international aid organizations and foreign investors everything could turn on a dime and be much better in just a few years. Phil agreed with me. “That's right!”, he said, “All Zimbabwe needs is confidence!”.